February 16, 2010

I Need Energy

Happy Tuesday everyone! The sun has actually emerged and all the beautiful icicles hanging from the edge of our place are melting and crashing and I just think it's all very beautiful! And, as I woke up this morning, I actually heard......BIRDS!!!  Yipppeee, that means, I hope, that spring is just around the corner.

Yesterday I promised I would give you part one of the story of my health journey, where I have come from and what brought me to the point of realization that I needed a daily multi-vitamin. So, let's get started. 

Energy, oh energy, where are you?! You used to run through my veins like an energetic, playful puppy, but now I just feel like a tired, old dog! :-/

I thought it would be pretty easy to walk 30 minutes every day...I mean, it's WALKING. Everyone can do that. The plan was to get this daily walk in right before dinner...or after dinner. I never dreamed it would take all the energy I could muster to just get through dinner.

I was all gung ho the first week, getting out that door every week night all puppy-like. The second week ~ not so much. It was like I had aged 5 dog years overnight...I managed 3 days that week. And, when the third week rolled around..five MORE dog years down the drain. I had lost my momentum, my drive, and somehow I imagined that what I would be giving up by NOT exercising wasn't so bad.

The truth? I was tired. Just plain tired. And REALLY not seeing straight. All the positive self-talk in the world couldn't have gotten me up off the floor, physically or emotionally. I wasn't wimpering excitedly in my sleep, dreaming about eating juicy steaks...I was having nightmares about my life being cut short.

Over the next several months, I would attempt many such starts. And stops. Frustrated, I began to wonder if something was wrong with my engine that daily use alone could not cure. It was like someone was pushing a button, cutting in, cutting out, making my motor misfire. I had all the will in the world to reach my very first fitness goal of walking 30 minutes each day, but it was like torture out there as I sputtered down the street....with every step I couldn't wait for it to be over. My body was exhausted. I made an appointment with my doctor.

Doctor Paq was gentle. He listened intently to me with sympathy in his eyes. He asked me lots of smart questions. He said "hmmmm, really?" and wrote lots of stuff down. He took ALOT of blood. And, 5 days later he called with what maybe most would consider bad news. But somehow, someway, it offered me a bit of relief . . . and hope.

Come back tomorrow for part 2 of the story.  But, before I go, can anybody relate so far? Have you ever felt so darn tired that every single thing you do is an effort?

hanging on,
Cheryl

4 comments:

  1. Hey girl. 12 lbs and counting. Keep up the good work. I know how you felt the other week about getting stuck. I am at that place now. The reason being too much leg work on the first day of fitness center. Live and learn. Keep up the good work Cheryl. Pat

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  2. That "stuck" place really sucks. I so wish you were close (I'm in Madison, WI) - I'm giving this seminar next month on the mental process that gets in the way of weight loss!

    http://www.patbarone.com/TraintheBrain.htm

    Waiting for your next post!

    Pat Barone, CPCC, PCC
    "America's Weight Loss Catalyst"

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  3. @Pat - Yeah, I think its the normal ebb and flow of life...and I've learned that perfection is really my enemy! Thanks for the encouragement!

    @Pat B - I'll check out your seminar! I'm about 3 hours from Madison, so we'll see! I think the worst part of being stuck is how helpless you feel...and I've come to see that I can't wait for my mind or emotions to always come around before I take action...just do the next right thing for my health. Thanks for stopping by!

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  4. You are doing well. I think this is very interesting and it will be so helpful for your readers who are in the same boat. I feel that way right now, but I know it is different. I cant wait to read more! Nice work on the weight loss girl!!! It is happening!

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